much better!!!!
i'm still not sure if it's gonna make it.. i doubt it.. but it is getting there... it's a good idea, but it's still a bit choppy. perhaps you should try giving the action more angles, and try for a story... give some background as to why the viewer should care about the object moving throughout the maze? now all it is is watching something move over and around things.
as you know the graphix aren't the best
but other than that the narrations were fine.. a bit like winnie the pooh though. the day by day thing was kinda cool, but i think the ice creme would have melted sooner... but it was funny....
btw i think Yoseph is emo... not to be mean but he's always crying over little things.
Yoseph is a bit temperamental but thats just his way. Thanks for the review.
This could have been better but it wasn't bad
the animation of the characters could have been more animated... they really didn't move throughout the whole movie. as well though.. the guns were drawn every well.
the back rounds could have been a lot more atmospheric and the sound effects could have sounded better.. you could.. i believe at the machine gun scene heard that it was a sound effect done by mouth. other wise it was a really good animation.
personally i liked it. i wanted to see it better though. i believe that with better, smother animation, and slightly more detailed artwork it could be a very well done animation. it has enough of a joke to make people laugh witch is better then a lot of animations here on newgrounds.... just keep up the work! it's good!
okay.. it wasn't bad
the movie was relitively alright. i've seen worse, but this isn't close to bad. i liked it. i just got really confused watching it. it seemed like several different artist made this. sometimes it was realistic, others it was all sticks. other than that no real problem.
you didn't want me to comment about time.
there wasn't near enough to comment about. there wasn't anthing to watch. it seems good, but all i saw was like the intro after you press play. i can't say more even though i want to. it did look REALLY good, but i couldn't really get into it. please make it way longer.
Yeah, I guess I will. I'm already starting another one today. I have to make another character, though... sigh. THAT takes longer than the ANIMATION.
okay, this looked great.
this is definately not ur first flash, maybe first submission, but not first flash. I really liked it. i couldn't really tell what that guy talking w/ R2D2 was saying, but everything else was great. i wish it were longer though, it barely felt like i had watched a whole intro. it didn't even feel like a trailer.
oh well good work. i'll wait for the rest.
Thank you. Yes, this was not my first FLASH but the first I ever submitted online. That wasn't R2, though now that you say it I didn't realize how simliar the beeps were. :)
there's nothing there.
the drawings are good, but the animation was amazingly simple (a bit of shape tweening). i was so sure thre would be more. it looked so smooth his mouth movements were smooth, and then the hands popped out and there was this first hopeful opening.... and then it was over. no story, just a bopping body with some floating hands. don't get me wrong, i have seen A LOT wrose, but after all the inital character creation time you must have used, it's such a waste to do "this."
i liked it's look.... but thats it. it was too short, wasn't funny, had no story, and didn't even have a peloader (unless since the movie was so short it just bypassed the whole loading screen).
aright, some were good....
okay, no doubt i've seen beter. and i've also seen worse. i'm talking in general, but for noobs, some of these were good.
overal, the animation quaility was poor, and the sounds, were lacking, and annoying at best. i could understand what was trying to be portayed, but it took a good amount of thinkingand peicing together puzzles made by the animators.
one of the animators stood out.... in a bad way. i think the name was johnny nukes, or something like that, the cable's out one. that one was really bad. i kept hoping for something more, an attempt at something like a story, or an effort in the animation process.
the one with the khcom sprits and the one with the changing lines were okay. i could tell that those two were really working toward some type of goal; weather it be learn the program, or attempt to develope a story.
the others were okay starting animations, but nothing really worth mentioning. atleast they weren't bad. "cable's out" i'm talking to you.
alright keep up the work. really i think it was "johnny" i'm just messing around. with a little bit of work i wouldn't be suprised if i see one of all these "noobs" works on newground's front page. this first couple, i'm almost sure won't. sry, if i'm right, but keep up the work.
That's a long review there pal, and seems somewhat repetative. Maybe some parts wheren't so good, but remember, this is flash from newbies, not your good artists.
Still, I kind of like Joey's :(
i love the message.
okay, i know i heard this skit on comedy cental presents before, but i'm not sure who did it. any way whoever did it, the message wasso much clearer with subtitles and music. seriously. so thanks for giving me this quilk veiw on the between the lines.
okay... i know you were hoping 4 a better score, everytime anyone submits anything they want a good score, so let me say i'm sorry. but i'm not gonna be an ass and not tell you why i din't score you higher.
1st the attempt at lip syncing was allright at best. if nothing else, you should have had the mouth move only when sounds come out. then if you wanted it to be a lot better, theres this thing you do to make the mouth move correctly to sounds. i can't remember the correct name for that but cheack out the lip syncing tutorials in the newgrounds tutorial section. they help a lot.
2nd there wasn't enough movements. i've seen bad mouth movements make it to newgrounds front page, just so long as theres something going on. the least you could have done was make the head a symbol and tween it around. for future referance you have to bring a character to life. make hi walk around, when he shows an emotion, make his whole face move not just his eye brows. i've seen it do wonders to animations. maybe.... if you re do this yet again, show the cars outside the drive-thru, give some backrounds. make it more life like.
okay, the break down is, just keep working. i think the message is great, but it's hard to sit through the whole movie to get the whole message. with a bit of work, your ideas are great s your animations could be too. i just think you have to put more effort into them.....
idk maybe im just being harsh. i wish you all tens and higher, but if not just keep working. good luck, it'shard out there for an animation pimp.
hmmm... a hard one to grade....
i've seen worse, and you're recreation of caracters is really nice. iwon't take that away from you. the thing is is that you used obvious short cuts, so you grafics aren't great (not to mention the lines are choppy), and it wasn't all that funny.if you weren't trying for funny, then i would have given you a higher grade, and i apoligize, yet it really seems like you were. honestly i thought it was "good," but i also think it could have been better. i think you could have made the rabbit go up to the computer, and you could have made it slightly longer. i know this is just a trailer type thing, but if and when you do come out with the real thing, i'll have to question wheather or not i want to see it. i think you could really have something here, if you just get rid of the laziness. thats your main problem, you just don't feel like making the rabbit turn.
mostly, you got a good idea, i just don't want to see it be blamed cuz it could have been better. work on it next time and you could go places.
Haven't been on this site in awhile, but doing a paper on memes made me miss this place.
Male
Environment Artist
too personal
FL
Joined on 8/9/06
Labyrinth 2 
Yoseph The Snail 
It's SPIRE! 
The Rise of Mortimer P1 
The Effort Collab 
Tuwoir: Rayman trailer 